I had to write again because my last entry was a little more negative than I like. But don’t fret. I am over it. I decided that part of my frustration was simply that I was bored. I am not one who deals well with having nothing to do. Doesn’t that just sound like a perfectionistic over-achiever? But anyway the very next day I came into work and I had a new project waiting on me. And imagine that. I have been in a better mood ever since.
I guess it is good that I learn this about myself now, while I am young. I get restless with something because I get bored with this. So the solution? Find something else to do. Keep things new and exciting. And that pesky fear of commitment. Well I think that the Marriage conference in Dallas will help me get over that. Yes. I said marriage conference. And yes, it’s in Dallas of all places.
Again. Oh well.
I have to have faith that, just like everything else, some good will come out of this.
Ok I am going to go now. But I leave you with this. “The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams” (Eleanor Roosevelt)
Take this job and shove it...
One of my favorite movies of all time is Office Space. Ok well I don't know if it really is one of my favorite movies, but for the moment it is. I like my job. I do. I am grateful to have it. However I am getting a little restless right now. It's warm outside. I am still used to having summers off. I'm tired of working on projects that never get used or utilized to their full potential, of getting pulled onto projects that I probably shouldn't be working on and have no experience in. Sure, sometimes that means I get to do cool things, things that at other places I would never get to have a say in. But not always. Not this time.
Anyway, I would rather be writing. After all a writer must write. If not that then at least reading a book. So now that you understand my frame of mind, you can understand why this is one of my top movies right now.
I always get restless. I suppose everyone does, but some just suck it up and others break. I'm a breaker. I don't like doing the same thing for too long. I get frustrated. I hate being tied down. I can't imagine working at one place for five years, or ten years. How can anyone work at the same place for that long? This fear is part of the reason why I fight so hard to be a writer. I want to live on my own schedule, doing the thing that I love the most. I want to wake up when I want and have the option of sitting on my bed and cranking out two chapters, or hopping down to the bookstore and taking notes in the cafe. I want to be able to take a break at ten if there is a interview on the radio I hear, or sit outside if it is a beautiful day. I want to wake up knowing that those choices are mine, and not feeling like I'm forced to spend my time working on making someone else's dreams come true. When do you stop working for someone else and start working for yourself? Do I have some unnatural flaw that prevents me from holding down a sane job? Do I have some extreme fear of commitment?
That is, I am sure, just what my mother would love to hear. That I, her eldest daughter, has a fear of commitment. It would only further her belief that I will not get married for another ten years. Ten years? Good lord. I want to be working on my second divorce by then. Honestly, talking to my mother about weddings was stressful enough to make me want to elope. My mother I am sure would love that. I have never really included my family into my personal life, even as an adolescent. There was always this piece of me that I had to keep to myself. I suppose that getting eloped would be that part of me, desperate to get the last laugh.
But Alls well that ends well. And this saga I call life will end well. I have to have faith. I have to believe. Otherwise, what would be the point.
So I am thinking of innovative ways to make money, and support myself while I write. Any suggestions out there? I would greatly appreciate it.
Anyway, I would rather be writing. After all a writer must write. If not that then at least reading a book. So now that you understand my frame of mind, you can understand why this is one of my top movies right now.
I always get restless. I suppose everyone does, but some just suck it up and others break. I'm a breaker. I don't like doing the same thing for too long. I get frustrated. I hate being tied down. I can't imagine working at one place for five years, or ten years. How can anyone work at the same place for that long? This fear is part of the reason why I fight so hard to be a writer. I want to live on my own schedule, doing the thing that I love the most. I want to wake up when I want and have the option of sitting on my bed and cranking out two chapters, or hopping down to the bookstore and taking notes in the cafe. I want to be able to take a break at ten if there is a interview on the radio I hear, or sit outside if it is a beautiful day. I want to wake up knowing that those choices are mine, and not feeling like I'm forced to spend my time working on making someone else's dreams come true. When do you stop working for someone else and start working for yourself? Do I have some unnatural flaw that prevents me from holding down a sane job? Do I have some extreme fear of commitment?
That is, I am sure, just what my mother would love to hear. That I, her eldest daughter, has a fear of commitment. It would only further her belief that I will not get married for another ten years. Ten years? Good lord. I want to be working on my second divorce by then. Honestly, talking to my mother about weddings was stressful enough to make me want to elope. My mother I am sure would love that. I have never really included my family into my personal life, even as an adolescent. There was always this piece of me that I had to keep to myself. I suppose that getting eloped would be that part of me, desperate to get the last laugh.
But Alls well that ends well. And this saga I call life will end well. I have to have faith. I have to believe. Otherwise, what would be the point.
So I am thinking of innovative ways to make money, and support myself while I write. Any suggestions out there? I would greatly appreciate it.
Techincal Assitance
Yes, I know that was spelled correctly. This is exactly how the woman who makes are name badges at work decided to spell it. It has been a running joke all year. However this blog is to post about some technical difficulties I had with the blog. Honest to goodness I have been writing entries. It's just that the past two times I have tried to post them, they never go through to the server. See. Scroll down. Yep. There's the entry for Wed. Just now appearing. Nice.
And Wed. was my favorite entry too.
Oh Well. I have lots to say but no time. So maybe later tonight.
And Wed. was my favorite entry too.
Oh Well. I have lots to say but no time. So maybe later tonight.
Happy Happy Joy Joy
YEA!!!!! I cannot believe it. I am so happy right now. I have been working on my novel since about 2 o'clock. Working and actually making progress. Good progress. I mean I have been writing on it ever since marcon, but today, for the first time in a long time I feel really, really good about what I have written. It's funny. It's sparks interest. There's conflict, and emotion. I have tried so hard to make sure all of these stupid elements were present. And today, today it just happens. It just comes out, and everything clicks. I've finally found my character.
How can I explain this in terms that nonwriters will understand. It's like going on a company retreat. You know your co-workers, you might even be friends with them, know their wife or their kids. But until you stay up half the night just talking, until you have that intimate bonding experience, there is still some distance between you.
That is what it was like with this character. I knew her, I knew her history. I could picture her clearly in my mind. But every time I sat down to write, she just wouldn't open up. I had to guess what her moves were, what actions she would take, and most of the time they were wrong. And now, she just goes. I'm like the cameraman that follows all of those celebrities around on reality TV shows. She isn't acting for the camera anymore. She's just being herself.
Hmm, let me introduce you to Lainey, my protagonist. She's young and gorgeous, with super-human strength, and a pile of bloodstained laundry. She doesn't drive under 80. She eats her steaks rare, and she's the number one suspect in an assassination plot. And even though she will beat me up for saying this, she's a softy at heart.
So I am going to go back to writing now. Actually I think I will fix some dinner first and then write. One chapter down! Woohoo!
How can I explain this in terms that nonwriters will understand. It's like going on a company retreat. You know your co-workers, you might even be friends with them, know their wife or their kids. But until you stay up half the night just talking, until you have that intimate bonding experience, there is still some distance between you.
That is what it was like with this character. I knew her, I knew her history. I could picture her clearly in my mind. But every time I sat down to write, she just wouldn't open up. I had to guess what her moves were, what actions she would take, and most of the time they were wrong. And now, she just goes. I'm like the cameraman that follows all of those celebrities around on reality TV shows. She isn't acting for the camera anymore. She's just being herself.
Hmm, let me introduce you to Lainey, my protagonist. She's young and gorgeous, with super-human strength, and a pile of bloodstained laundry. She doesn't drive under 80. She eats her steaks rare, and she's the number one suspect in an assassination plot. And even though she will beat me up for saying this, she's a softy at heart.
So I am going to go back to writing now. Actually I think I will fix some dinner first and then write. One chapter down! Woohoo!
Advice from the pros...
Sorry. It's been a few days. But all in all I am getting a lot better about posting.
Last night I had my writer's group meeting. The first chapter of my novel was critiqued and I was very happy with the results. Oh sure. It wasn't perfect. But almost all of the comments were very helpful. I finally feel like this novel is making progress. And I can see how much my writing is improving because of my writing group. I learn from critiquing others pieces. I learn by reading their comments on my pieces. Sometimes I read a story or chapter over and over again, and I can't put my finger on what is wrong. And I will workshop it with my writing group, and they will be able to help me figure out what is missing, or where it went wrong.
I read over the comments today, and I am still very satisfied with the first reaction of the chapter. I wasn't clear enough on a few ideas but I realize that, and it is only a days work to make the changes. Not only that But Kathy, who has published 4 novels, and taught creative writing, has offered to work with me on a one-to-one basis after I expressed my frustration with getting together the first few chapters. I am grateful that she is willing to work with me. I really admire her and her writing. She does pretty amazing things with her stories, and even though her novel is something that I probably wouldn't pick up off the shelf and read on my own, I am hooked to her story, and can't wait to read more of it.
So now I am rambling about how wonderful my writing group is. I could do this for days, but I think that I will spare all you readers out there. I have a much more interesting post coming up. Stay tuned.
Last night I had my writer's group meeting. The first chapter of my novel was critiqued and I was very happy with the results. Oh sure. It wasn't perfect. But almost all of the comments were very helpful. I finally feel like this novel is making progress. And I can see how much my writing is improving because of my writing group. I learn from critiquing others pieces. I learn by reading their comments on my pieces. Sometimes I read a story or chapter over and over again, and I can't put my finger on what is wrong. And I will workshop it with my writing group, and they will be able to help me figure out what is missing, or where it went wrong.
I read over the comments today, and I am still very satisfied with the first reaction of the chapter. I wasn't clear enough on a few ideas but I realize that, and it is only a days work to make the changes. Not only that But Kathy, who has published 4 novels, and taught creative writing, has offered to work with me on a one-to-one basis after I expressed my frustration with getting together the first few chapters. I am grateful that she is willing to work with me. I really admire her and her writing. She does pretty amazing things with her stories, and even though her novel is something that I probably wouldn't pick up off the shelf and read on my own, I am hooked to her story, and can't wait to read more of it.
So now I am rambling about how wonderful my writing group is. I could do this for days, but I think that I will spare all you readers out there. I have a much more interesting post coming up. Stay tuned.
Five Nights of Great Sex...
Nope. Get your mind out of the gutter. I'm talking about TBS Sex and the City. Can I tell you how much this show rocks.
I would like to point out however, that I was always a huge fan of Sex and the City. I could jump on my feminist soapbox and rant about how women aren't allowed as much freedom to talk about their sexuality as men. I can point out a thousand ways in which society confines women, and punishes them for being both too sexual or not sexual enough. But I said I wouldn't get on that soapbox and I'm not, except to say that Sex and the City, sort of help level the playing field.
So yea! Hooray! Whoopee!!!
OK so I am going to go do something. LOL. Not sure what. But something.
I would like to point out however, that I was always a huge fan of Sex and the City. I could jump on my feminist soapbox and rant about how women aren't allowed as much freedom to talk about their sexuality as men. I can point out a thousand ways in which society confines women, and punishes them for being both too sexual or not sexual enough. But I said I wouldn't get on that soapbox and I'm not, except to say that Sex and the City, sort of help level the playing field.
So yea! Hooray! Whoopee!!!
OK so I am going to go do something. LOL. Not sure what. But something.
Signs
Signs are everywhere! I went to the library today and both books that I put on reserve for research on my short story, were there eventhough I hadn't been contacted yet by the library. Then I went over to the new books area and I found Catherine Asaro's new book (a writer I met less than a year ago) and as I kept looking I found another book from Rosemary Laurey, a former member of my writing group. I finally decided to stop looking when I found a third book, this time non-fiction, on Teen life in Africa, which is related to the topic in my short story. I figured if I kept looking I would only find more books that were interesting so I had to leave immediately if I wanted to get any writing done over the next week.
So now I have like a billion books to read, but that is ok. Because what else is there to do in the summer but read. Well that and summer blockbuster movies. Which I must admit, I have a huge weakness for. I love the cheesy action flick. I can't wait for Spider Man 2. I love the movies that create all the hoopla. There is always two or three movies that everyone knows will be a hit. And even if it isn't the hoopla before hand, the hype...It makes it all worth it.
But anyway, summers are meant for reading. As a child I used to spend the day curled up on the couch lost in a book from the moment I woke up, until the moment my mom got home from work, and yelled at me for not doing chores. I would carry a paperback with me everywhere, in the car, at the mall, to restaurants. I wanted to read at all times, and I had to make sure that I could read whenever I had a spare moment. When I hit 12 I started reading adult novels, because I went through young adult books so quickly. I kind of wish I was a teen now, because the YA market has exploded, or at least it seems like it has. I must admit that I have been known to breeze through a YA novel when I need a little light reading. Some of them are really quite good. And unfortunately, between working full-time and writing all other times, my time allotment for reading that doesn't directly benefit those two categories is slim to none.
Someone once told me that if you don't read, then you might as well not even talk to me, because we don't have anything in common. I disagree with this statement. Do I have time to pick up a copy of war and peace, or reread Moby Dick to analyze whether or not my opinions on it have changed since reading it as a teen? No. But that doesn't mean that books aren't a part of my life. In fact they are an important part of who I am, seeing as I am a writer. And seeing how I want to open a bookstore, well yes books are a part of my life. But that doesn't mean I have read everything under the sun. I want to, but there's just not enough time. And even if there was, part of being a writer, is living. You can't write about what you don't know, what you haven't lived, or seen or heard of. I think that is part of the reason I didn't major in English at College. Sure there was a creative writing program at the university, it might even be good, or better than I imagine. But you can't write about writing. Or you can, but it would be rather dull, and probably a lame impression of something that has already been done. But new ideas, fresh inspiration, that comes from life, and learning.
So now that I have gone way off track with this entry I will stop and read some Pablo Neruda. I love him. Although I am not really that sure about this book though. Well see.
Oh, by the way, I did actually submit my first chapter of my novel to my writing group. I suppose that is progress. I spent most of Tuesday revising it. And every step was painful, and I only anticipate that it will get worse before it gets better, but oh well. Sometimes life hurts too. I watched Big Fish, yesterday. Good movie. And the main character, he says that "the most painful things, usually turn out to be the most rewarding when your finished." I agree. Getting their may hurt, but it only makes the finish line that much sweeter. Let's just hope eventually the process gets easier. I don't want to be going through this same pain in twenty years. New Pain! New Pain!
So now I have like a billion books to read, but that is ok. Because what else is there to do in the summer but read. Well that and summer blockbuster movies. Which I must admit, I have a huge weakness for. I love the cheesy action flick. I can't wait for Spider Man 2. I love the movies that create all the hoopla. There is always two or three movies that everyone knows will be a hit. And even if it isn't the hoopla before hand, the hype...It makes it all worth it.
But anyway, summers are meant for reading. As a child I used to spend the day curled up on the couch lost in a book from the moment I woke up, until the moment my mom got home from work, and yelled at me for not doing chores. I would carry a paperback with me everywhere, in the car, at the mall, to restaurants. I wanted to read at all times, and I had to make sure that I could read whenever I had a spare moment. When I hit 12 I started reading adult novels, because I went through young adult books so quickly. I kind of wish I was a teen now, because the YA market has exploded, or at least it seems like it has. I must admit that I have been known to breeze through a YA novel when I need a little light reading. Some of them are really quite good. And unfortunately, between working full-time and writing all other times, my time allotment for reading that doesn't directly benefit those two categories is slim to none.
Someone once told me that if you don't read, then you might as well not even talk to me, because we don't have anything in common. I disagree with this statement. Do I have time to pick up a copy of war and peace, or reread Moby Dick to analyze whether or not my opinions on it have changed since reading it as a teen? No. But that doesn't mean that books aren't a part of my life. In fact they are an important part of who I am, seeing as I am a writer. And seeing how I want to open a bookstore, well yes books are a part of my life. But that doesn't mean I have read everything under the sun. I want to, but there's just not enough time. And even if there was, part of being a writer, is living. You can't write about what you don't know, what you haven't lived, or seen or heard of. I think that is part of the reason I didn't major in English at College. Sure there was a creative writing program at the university, it might even be good, or better than I imagine. But you can't write about writing. Or you can, but it would be rather dull, and probably a lame impression of something that has already been done. But new ideas, fresh inspiration, that comes from life, and learning.
So now that I have gone way off track with this entry I will stop and read some Pablo Neruda. I love him. Although I am not really that sure about this book though. Well see.
Oh, by the way, I did actually submit my first chapter of my novel to my writing group. I suppose that is progress. I spent most of Tuesday revising it. And every step was painful, and I only anticipate that it will get worse before it gets better, but oh well. Sometimes life hurts too. I watched Big Fish, yesterday. Good movie. And the main character, he says that "the most painful things, usually turn out to be the most rewarding when your finished." I agree. Getting their may hurt, but it only makes the finish line that much sweeter. Let's just hope eventually the process gets easier. I don't want to be going through this same pain in twenty years. New Pain! New Pain!
another quiz....
I Knew it...
You are going to marry Brad Pitt. He is always
friendly to anybody he ever meets and he is
very talented as an actor. He is also very
sincere and friendly. He will respect you until
the day he dies. Congrats!!
Which male celebrity are you going to marry? (14 choices now!!)
brought to you by Quizilla
You are going to marry Brad Pitt. He is always
friendly to anybody he ever meets and he is
very talented as an actor. He is also very
sincere and friendly. He will respect you until
the day he dies. Congrats!!
Which male celebrity are you going to marry? (14 choices now!!)
brought to you by Quizilla
Teenage Drama Queens and Harry Potter
So life with a 14 year old girl is...well...like no other thing I can think of. Everything is a crisis, everything is an emergency needing immediate attention. It doesn't matter what you agree to because she will simply say or do the exact opposite of what you want. It makes me want to not have kids. Or find a really nice boarding school for those pesky teenage years. Let them get angry and overdramatic at some other adult.
So I watched the new Harry Potter Movie last weekend. Did I like it? Yes. Did I love it? hmmm. Love is such a strong word. I'm not ready to make that kind of commitment yet. So without spoiling it for anyone who is slow and has yet to see it, I am going to attempt to explain my issues with this film, sort of a form of couples therapy. lol. You be the shrink.
Ok. The book is just better. I know I know, everyone says that. But IT IS!!!! The book is sooo much better. I mean the first two books of Harry Potter are good. Not great, but for what they were supposed to be, they are good. The third and fourth book are great. A little thicker, a little more complexity, a little more emotional and personal conflict. They aren't the Nancy drew type mysteries of the first two books. The fifth book, well that is just to get you from point a to point C. There is a lot of information in there, but it's a very large book for what little actually happens.
The first two movies are excellent. I think they did a wonderful job translating the world of harry potter on screen. It was, in fact, the world of harry potter in the first film that made me curious enough to read the books. Watching the deleted scenes of the second movie, there are scenes that I think they should have kept in, that helped solidify the story, but the film was funny as an elephant's butt, so who cares if they took out two or three shots here or there.
But the third one, well it is shorter for one. I am all for the shorter movies, but you can't rush the story. Certain information needs to be explained and I just felt like it wasn't. I felt like the only reason I had any clue what was going on, was because I read the book.
But another theory could be that the reason I like the book better is because I recognize how much time and energy went into writing the book. To see the back story, the foundation, the intricacy of the book cut from the movie, it is sad.
Ok it is has been a long time, and I keep getting pulled away from this message, so I am going to end now. But I reserve the right to return to this subject at a later date.
Meeting Adjourned.
So I watched the new Harry Potter Movie last weekend. Did I like it? Yes. Did I love it? hmmm. Love is such a strong word. I'm not ready to make that kind of commitment yet. So without spoiling it for anyone who is slow and has yet to see it, I am going to attempt to explain my issues with this film, sort of a form of couples therapy. lol. You be the shrink.
Ok. The book is just better. I know I know, everyone says that. But IT IS!!!! The book is sooo much better. I mean the first two books of Harry Potter are good. Not great, but for what they were supposed to be, they are good. The third and fourth book are great. A little thicker, a little more complexity, a little more emotional and personal conflict. They aren't the Nancy drew type mysteries of the first two books. The fifth book, well that is just to get you from point a to point C. There is a lot of information in there, but it's a very large book for what little actually happens.
The first two movies are excellent. I think they did a wonderful job translating the world of harry potter on screen. It was, in fact, the world of harry potter in the first film that made me curious enough to read the books. Watching the deleted scenes of the second movie, there are scenes that I think they should have kept in, that helped solidify the story, but the film was funny as an elephant's butt, so who cares if they took out two or three shots here or there.
But the third one, well it is shorter for one. I am all for the shorter movies, but you can't rush the story. Certain information needs to be explained and I just felt like it wasn't. I felt like the only reason I had any clue what was going on, was because I read the book.
But another theory could be that the reason I like the book better is because I recognize how much time and energy went into writing the book. To see the back story, the foundation, the intricacy of the book cut from the movie, it is sad.
Ok it is has been a long time, and I keep getting pulled away from this message, so I am going to end now. But I reserve the right to return to this subject at a later date.
Meeting Adjourned.
The Beer Quiz...
Requires more thinking and coordination than one would imagine. Anyway, I think I am going to have to stop taking these quizzes, they are getting a little too personal. Honestly though. Despite what the quiz may suggest, I am not an alcoholic. I am however 23.
FORGET BEER, PASS THE LIQUOR: Oh, beer's fine, but
if someone else is buying, you want the
expensive stuff. Really, you're not that
concerned with other people; the drink is much
more important. You love to entertain and
adore attention. You don't always know your
limit, but how important are limits? Live life
large, and drink double shots.
The Greatest Beer Quiz, ever!
brought to you by Quizilla
FORGET BEER, PASS THE LIQUOR: Oh, beer's fine, but
if someone else is buying, you want the
expensive stuff. Really, you're not that
concerned with other people; the drink is much
more important. You love to entertain and
adore attention. You don't always know your
limit, but how important are limits? Live life
large, and drink double shots.
The Greatest Beer Quiz, ever!
brought to you by Quizilla
Lions and Tigers and Bears Oh My!
I saw the lion king last night. It was wonderful. Visually stunning. I would see it again if I could afford the tickets. The costumes, the props, the set, it was all beautiful. It must be amazing to see your work come together in a show like that. I don't think that I will ever write anything that will become a broadway show, but hey you never know.
I got an email from an editor who will remain nameless, with submission guidlines for a new anthology. Now that I have those four pages of rules in my tiny little novice hands, I can honestly say I was scared I wouldn't get them. I don't know why. I still have those nightmares of editors shredding my stories and shoving them into an exploding can and sending it fedex. Someone told me a few weeks ago, that as long as an editor doesn't send you a regection letter FedEx, you're ok. Could you imagine! "This story was so bad, I had to contact you within 24 hours to tell you how much you suck!"
So I am still reading STORY. There are a few other recommended readings that I might check out, but now I have a whole new list of books to read as research for this short story anthology. But I am really eager to start putting some of this theory to practice. I had a few Ahh Ha moments, while reading, and my own novel is stronger because of it.
After much thought on this whole idea of how-to books on writing, I decided that you can teach specific elements of the craft, but you can't teach imagination, or creativity. Writing is hard. It's the reason so many great writers had tragic deaths. Ok maybe that isn't the only factor. But it is hard work and I truly believe that anyone can have a good idea, know a little bit of grammar and decide they want to write a book. But there is a reason so many people start and never finish. It takes a certain amount of insainity to spend hundreds of hours on something that may only serve as firestarter. There are no promises with writing. No guarantees. And it isn't the best way to get rich quick. Heck, it isn't the best way to get rich period. You have to do it because you have no other choice. Because you can't imagine not writing, because you have this story and you are going to burst at the seams if you don't tell someone soon. Me, I have hundreds of stories. Well, maybe not hundreds, but I have at least three novels rolling in my head at this vary moment, two of which are the first books in sequels, and about fifteen short stories in progress, or sketched out.
Sometimes I know the characters, and they want me to share their story. Other times, I have never met the characters. I just know the event, the outcome, the climax. I see bits and peices and I have to put them all together so that they make sense to the reader. I can do it. It will just take time.
I got an email from an editor who will remain nameless, with submission guidlines for a new anthology. Now that I have those four pages of rules in my tiny little novice hands, I can honestly say I was scared I wouldn't get them. I don't know why. I still have those nightmares of editors shredding my stories and shoving them into an exploding can and sending it fedex. Someone told me a few weeks ago, that as long as an editor doesn't send you a regection letter FedEx, you're ok. Could you imagine! "This story was so bad, I had to contact you within 24 hours to tell you how much you suck!"
So I am still reading STORY. There are a few other recommended readings that I might check out, but now I have a whole new list of books to read as research for this short story anthology. But I am really eager to start putting some of this theory to practice. I had a few Ahh Ha moments, while reading, and my own novel is stronger because of it.
After much thought on this whole idea of how-to books on writing, I decided that you can teach specific elements of the craft, but you can't teach imagination, or creativity. Writing is hard. It's the reason so many great writers had tragic deaths. Ok maybe that isn't the only factor. But it is hard work and I truly believe that anyone can have a good idea, know a little bit of grammar and decide they want to write a book. But there is a reason so many people start and never finish. It takes a certain amount of insainity to spend hundreds of hours on something that may only serve as firestarter. There are no promises with writing. No guarantees. And it isn't the best way to get rich quick. Heck, it isn't the best way to get rich period. You have to do it because you have no other choice. Because you can't imagine not writing, because you have this story and you are going to burst at the seams if you don't tell someone soon. Me, I have hundreds of stories. Well, maybe not hundreds, but I have at least three novels rolling in my head at this vary moment, two of which are the first books in sequels, and about fifteen short stories in progress, or sketched out.
Sometimes I know the characters, and they want me to share their story. Other times, I have never met the characters. I just know the event, the outcome, the climax. I see bits and peices and I have to put them all together so that they make sense to the reader. I can do it. It will just take time.
Craft Craft Craft....
So I am making progress on my novel. I worked for about three hours yesterday and now have about 40 pages. I am going to do a brief revision on this chunk so that I can post it to my writing group. That anal retentive nature of mine won't let me post anything without at least one round of revisions. I am excited with the changes I have made, and feel like the story is really coming together.
I owe a great deal of thanks to a member of my writing group, who suggested I read Robert McKee's book "Story". It has been so helpful. I got it about a week ago, but distracted by Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban, I didn't start reading it until Sunday. Now I can't put it down. I read it over my lunch break. I read it from 5 when I got home until 9:30 when I stopped to print off my story. Not only do I find it entertaining and easy to read, but it is exactly what I was looking for. I wanted very specific and precise definitions of what a story is, the elements it contains, and how they should be pieced together. This book does just that. And even though it is primarily written for screenwriters, it is easily transferable to fiction, since the stories of films are primarily fiction themselves.
SO I suggest that anyone trying to write a story, or curious about the craft of writing, read this book. I really like a comparison he makes in the first chapter. "If your dream were to compose music, would you say to yourself: 'I've heard a lot of symphonies...I can also play the piano...I think I'll knock one out this weekend'? No. But that's exactly how many screenwriter's begin: 'I've seen a lot of fliks, some good, some bad...I got A's in English...Vacation time is coming...Maybe I'll write a movie."
I love this, and I would argue that this is exactly how many new writer's come to be. I could even argue that it is how I came to be, minus one crucial element. I read lots of books. I was always good at English, and Writing, and yes, one day I thought I can do this. But the difference is, once I decided I could do this, I immediately looked for ways to master the craft. My trouble was that there are very few books, good books, that deal with the craft of writing. I think that writers, simply like to be expressive and talk of the joys of writing, the ups and downs, the antecdotes that make us laugh, and cry and connect to one another, but there are few books that deal with the structure of a story, the elements that should be present. Oh sure, there are the books that list the main items that everyone knows, plot, character, setting, beginning, middle, and end, climax, resolution...These things are always mentioned but not much help and in most cases already known. But what makes a plot? What differentiates act one from Act three. How long should a scene be? How do you decide where to place that scene? Where does your story begin, where does it end? These are the questions that I have been trying to answer, and finally I have an answer. Even if I disagree with some of what he says, at least it's an answer, a set of rules that I can follow or break.
Ok so I am going to go back to reading the book, because in talking about it, I decided I missed reading it. Maybe I will revise the first two chapters tomorrow.
Oh and by the way, I am going to see the Lion King tomorrow. I wonder if I can apply the story to the structure device McKee has created?
Look how good I am at posting to the blog!!! I'm shooting for daily, and I suppose as long as I am in a good mood, I will be able to keep that up.
I owe a great deal of thanks to a member of my writing group, who suggested I read Robert McKee's book "Story". It has been so helpful. I got it about a week ago, but distracted by Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban, I didn't start reading it until Sunday. Now I can't put it down. I read it over my lunch break. I read it from 5 when I got home until 9:30 when I stopped to print off my story. Not only do I find it entertaining and easy to read, but it is exactly what I was looking for. I wanted very specific and precise definitions of what a story is, the elements it contains, and how they should be pieced together. This book does just that. And even though it is primarily written for screenwriters, it is easily transferable to fiction, since the stories of films are primarily fiction themselves.
SO I suggest that anyone trying to write a story, or curious about the craft of writing, read this book. I really like a comparison he makes in the first chapter. "If your dream were to compose music, would you say to yourself: 'I've heard a lot of symphonies...I can also play the piano...I think I'll knock one out this weekend'? No. But that's exactly how many screenwriter's begin: 'I've seen a lot of fliks, some good, some bad...I got A's in English...Vacation time is coming...Maybe I'll write a movie."
I love this, and I would argue that this is exactly how many new writer's come to be. I could even argue that it is how I came to be, minus one crucial element. I read lots of books. I was always good at English, and Writing, and yes, one day I thought I can do this. But the difference is, once I decided I could do this, I immediately looked for ways to master the craft. My trouble was that there are very few books, good books, that deal with the craft of writing. I think that writers, simply like to be expressive and talk of the joys of writing, the ups and downs, the antecdotes that make us laugh, and cry and connect to one another, but there are few books that deal with the structure of a story, the elements that should be present. Oh sure, there are the books that list the main items that everyone knows, plot, character, setting, beginning, middle, and end, climax, resolution...These things are always mentioned but not much help and in most cases already known. But what makes a plot? What differentiates act one from Act three. How long should a scene be? How do you decide where to place that scene? Where does your story begin, where does it end? These are the questions that I have been trying to answer, and finally I have an answer. Even if I disagree with some of what he says, at least it's an answer, a set of rules that I can follow or break.
Ok so I am going to go back to reading the book, because in talking about it, I decided I missed reading it. Maybe I will revise the first two chapters tomorrow.
Oh and by the way, I am going to see the Lion King tomorrow. I wonder if I can apply the story to the structure device McKee has created?
Look how good I am at posting to the blog!!! I'm shooting for daily, and I suppose as long as I am in a good mood, I will be able to keep that up.
which 80's toy are you?
I took this quiz and found out the following....
You're an Etch-a-Sketch!! You're the creative,
artsy type who doesn't need to actually utilize
a single muscle group in order to have fun.
Doesn't matter though, you're still cool.
What childhood toy from the 80s are you?
brought to you by Quizilla
You're an Etch-a-Sketch!! You're the creative,
artsy type who doesn't need to actually utilize
a single muscle group in order to have fun.
Doesn't matter though, you're still cool.
What childhood toy from the 80s are you?
brought to you by Quizilla
Sunday Afternoons...
So it is Sunday afternoon. I have the house to myself, after a long and yet exhausting weekend of fun filled adventures with Harry Potter. It's just me and the dog, some blues music and a margarita. The only thing that could make it better would be reading a really good book.
But I don't have a really good book to read, and I hope that writing a really good book will make up for it. Some days I wish I could speed through the writing. I wish I had the discipline and perhaps the talent to sit down and crank out 20 or thirty pages. Part of my problem I realized is that I am such a perfectionist. I spend so much time worrying about what I have already written that I can't get out of the first act of the book. Or at least not successfully. I've made three plot changes so far, and it seems like a bit much, but I really think they are necessary. With each new change I think the plot and the story gets better and better. Or at least I hope it does. I don't think that I need to do any major plot changes, at least not for the part that I have outlined. I am just going to go right now and see what happens. And I am going to try my hardest to focus on moving forward and not reworking the first three or four chapters to death.
Everyone says it. Don't get caught up in revisions if you don't have a complete draft. I would say it too if I was an experienced author. Because logically it makes perfect sense. Revisions are like plastic surgery, like remolding your house, but you can't do that until you have the basic foundations, the basic structure. You have to have something to work from. Me I have nothing to work from except for these worlds I have created in my head. And sometimes I think I am never going to manage to get them out on paper, at least not enough that I will like them. But like some drug addict, I can't resist the attempt to try. I can't walk past a laptop and not have the urge to sit down and tell my story. Or my character's story.
So I keep writing, In hopes that maybe one day I will finish this book, and it will actually sell.
But I don't have a really good book to read, and I hope that writing a really good book will make up for it. Some days I wish I could speed through the writing. I wish I had the discipline and perhaps the talent to sit down and crank out 20 or thirty pages. Part of my problem I realized is that I am such a perfectionist. I spend so much time worrying about what I have already written that I can't get out of the first act of the book. Or at least not successfully. I've made three plot changes so far, and it seems like a bit much, but I really think they are necessary. With each new change I think the plot and the story gets better and better. Or at least I hope it does. I don't think that I need to do any major plot changes, at least not for the part that I have outlined. I am just going to go right now and see what happens. And I am going to try my hardest to focus on moving forward and not reworking the first three or four chapters to death.
Everyone says it. Don't get caught up in revisions if you don't have a complete draft. I would say it too if I was an experienced author. Because logically it makes perfect sense. Revisions are like plastic surgery, like remolding your house, but you can't do that until you have the basic foundations, the basic structure. You have to have something to work from. Me I have nothing to work from except for these worlds I have created in my head. And sometimes I think I am never going to manage to get them out on paper, at least not enough that I will like them. But like some drug addict, I can't resist the attempt to try. I can't walk past a laptop and not have the urge to sit down and tell my story. Or my character's story.
So I keep writing, In hopes that maybe one day I will finish this book, and it will actually sell.
How to be a geek:101
When did being a geek become cool? When did we stop caring what other people think about us? One day pleasing everyone is the most important thing in the world, and then one day, it just isn't. It stops. And it's a good thing it stops too, because life would be damn hard if we had to spend the whole time trying to please other people. Even the concept is flawed because as humans we a very inconsistent. What makes us happy one day, we could care less about the next. Look at pop culture, look at pop music. Look at teens. Fads come and go so fast they often leave skid marks (very badly dressed skid marks).
I'm not saying that I don't care what people think of me. I do, a little. I'm a writer and I want people to like my writing. I want them to enjoy my books and short stories. In a sense I am trying to make a career out of pleasing people. Maybe not pleasing the world, but pleasing a group large enough to get a decent royalty check. I care, but somewhere along the road, on the path to growing up, you care less and less.
I think I can pinpoint the moment when I stopped caring. The moment was immediate, the withdrawal, the backlash, that lasted a lot longer. I was in college. It was my freshman year, and I remember sitting in my dorm room thinking, I can do anything, I can be anyone. Something happens when you are pulled away from everyone and everything you know. All of the expectations that family and friends place upon you, they are suddenly gone. In college, no one knows if you were teachers pet, or a drama geek. No one knows, if you were a skater, or a player, a jock, or a homecoming queen. And it's nice to be at that place where you can reshape and remold your personality. I think we do that several times in our lives, until we become the person we want to become. Each new job each new school, each new love. We have a chance to change, and we become a little more free if we are willing.
I love those moments. The moment when you look up and realize that you can get lost in the crowd, that you are surrounded by hundreds of strangers and you can check your baggage at the door. Maybe that is why I love New York so much. Maybe that's why I love writing. It's just one more thing that I can get lost in. Do I live vicariously through my characters, sure I do, when I write, when I read, I get do things I would never do in my own life, for hundreds of perfectly good reasons, but that is what a good story does. It pulls you into the story.
Anyway, if you are curious about becoming a geek check out www.thinkgeek.com I love this site.
I'm not saying that I don't care what people think of me. I do, a little. I'm a writer and I want people to like my writing. I want them to enjoy my books and short stories. In a sense I am trying to make a career out of pleasing people. Maybe not pleasing the world, but pleasing a group large enough to get a decent royalty check. I care, but somewhere along the road, on the path to growing up, you care less and less.
I think I can pinpoint the moment when I stopped caring. The moment was immediate, the withdrawal, the backlash, that lasted a lot longer. I was in college. It was my freshman year, and I remember sitting in my dorm room thinking, I can do anything, I can be anyone. Something happens when you are pulled away from everyone and everything you know. All of the expectations that family and friends place upon you, they are suddenly gone. In college, no one knows if you were teachers pet, or a drama geek. No one knows, if you were a skater, or a player, a jock, or a homecoming queen. And it's nice to be at that place where you can reshape and remold your personality. I think we do that several times in our lives, until we become the person we want to become. Each new job each new school, each new love. We have a chance to change, and we become a little more free if we are willing.
I love those moments. The moment when you look up and realize that you can get lost in the crowd, that you are surrounded by hundreds of strangers and you can check your baggage at the door. Maybe that is why I love New York so much. Maybe that's why I love writing. It's just one more thing that I can get lost in. Do I live vicariously through my characters, sure I do, when I write, when I read, I get do things I would never do in my own life, for hundreds of perfectly good reasons, but that is what a good story does. It pulls you into the story.
Anyway, if you are curious about becoming a geek check out www.thinkgeek.com I love this site.
Meditation
So I am feeling much better today. Yesterday was the first day I had that was good. Ok the first day I had in the real world that was good. My weekend was fabulous, but I was in a different world. A world I loved, but don't live in every day. Anyway, I am finally feeling good. I did a tarot card reading on Tuesday night. I think the cards surprised me. I knew I was sort of in a funky mood. I knew I was being bitter and petty to people I cared the most about. Not all of it was intentional. But I couldn't help myself, and I needed to find away to release the bitterness and negative energy inside me that I had been carrying around for days. I needed to stop blaming my friends for not being the people I wanted them to be.
So I got this really cool book from the Library, called "The Writer's Mentor". It's funny how I have moved from reading about how to write fiction, to reading the war room stories from authors themselves. I prefer the latter. (sorry about the interruption. My dog just joined me on the bed. Dogs are great. Did you know people who own dogs live longer happier lives. They are also less likely to get depressed. Dogs are great because their love is unconditional, and they rely on you so much, it's like to the dog you are god. god with the food. lol.)
Anyway, I started reading this book, "The Writer's Mentor" which is full of wonderful quotes and tidbits of advice from hundreds of famous writers. So today's quote is this, "writing is finally a series of permissions you give to yourself to be expressive in certain ways. To invent. To leap. To fly. To fall." (Susan Sontag) I think that is very appropriate considering my last few posts.
So I got this really cool book from the Library, called "The Writer's Mentor". It's funny how I have moved from reading about how to write fiction, to reading the war room stories from authors themselves. I prefer the latter. (sorry about the interruption. My dog just joined me on the bed. Dogs are great. Did you know people who own dogs live longer happier lives. They are also less likely to get depressed. Dogs are great because their love is unconditional, and they rely on you so much, it's like to the dog you are god. god with the food. lol.)
Anyway, I started reading this book, "The Writer's Mentor" which is full of wonderful quotes and tidbits of advice from hundreds of famous writers. So today's quote is this, "writing is finally a series of permissions you give to yourself to be expressive in certain ways. To invent. To leap. To fly. To fall." (Susan Sontag) I think that is very appropriate considering my last few posts.
Indiscretions
I know who I am going to marry. I met him at the convention. He's tall, with broad shoulders and rich bronze skin. His hair hangs down to his waist but he often twists it tightly at the nape of his neck. Not into a bun, but an intricate Boy Scout knot. He's dressed in all black. Crisp button down shirt open at the collar so the sterling silver chain can be seen. He looks good in black.
He likes to listen to my stories. He sits at my feet, at the foot of the bed, listening to my words. They make him laugh, fill him with wonder. How can anyone create a world such as this? He doesn't understand failure, or how I can doubt my future as a published author. "You're already an author," he says. "Start smiling."
He likes to listen to my stories. He sits at my feet, at the foot of the bed, listening to my words. They make him laugh, fill him with wonder. How can anyone create a world such as this? He doesn't understand failure, or how I can doubt my future as a published author. "You're already an author," he says. "Start smiling."
Political Junkie Overdose
So Yesterday was Memorial Day, and what better way to celebrate than watching 10 hours of West Wing? Ok, so maybe Politics is my thing and no one else's. That's ok. I can still argue that this show has some of the best writing I have seen in TV for a long time. Absolutely beautiful. OK and so I have a connection to one of the writers, it doesn't make me biased!
So I spent the other half of my day doing research. Way, way too much research, but I found some interesting stuff. Like the story of Lilith, which depending on who your source is, Lilith can be seen as the spawn of Satan, or the first feminist.
Anyway I want to share this version of the story with you, because I think it is just nifty...
This is taken from the text of "The Alphabet of Ben
Sira", the text is dated somewhere between the 8th & 10th cent. CE, and its place within Judaism has been debated.
Soon afterward the young son of the king took ill,
Said Nebuchadnezzar, "Heal my son. If you don't, I
will kill you." Ben Sira immediately sat down and
wrote an amulet with the Holy Name, and he inscribed
on it the angels in charge of medicine by their names,
forms and images, and by their wings, hands, and feet.
Nebuchadnezzar looked at the amulet. "Who are these?"
"The angles who are in charge of medicine: Snvi,
Snsvi, and Smnglof (more common names Senoy, Sansenoy,
and Semangelof). After God created Adam, who was
alone, He said, 'It is not good for man to be alone'
(Gen. 2:18). He then created a woman for Adam, from
the earth, as He had created Adam himself, and called
her Lilith. Adam and Lilith began to fight. She said,
'I will not lie below,' and he said, 'I will not lie
beneath you, but only on top. For you are fit only to
be in the bottom position, while I am to be in the
superior one.' Lilith responded, 'We are equal to each
other inasmuch as we were both created from the
earth.' But they would not listen to one another. When
Lilith saw this, she pronounced the Ineffable Name and
flew away into the air. Adam stood in prayer before
his Creator: 'Sovereign of the universe!' he said,
'the woman you gave me has run away.' At once, the
Holy One, blessed be He, sent these three angles to
bring her back.
"Said the Holy One to Adam, 'If she agrees to come
back, fine. If not she must permit one hundred of her
children to die every day.' The angels left God and
pursued Lilith, whom they overtook in the midst of the
sea, in the mighty waters wherein the Egyptians were
destined to drown. They told her God's word, but she
did not wish to return. The angels said, 'We shall
drown you in the sea.'
"'Leave me!' she said. 'I was created only to cause
sickness to infants. If the infant is male, I have
dominion over him for eight days after his birth, and
if female, for twenty days.'
"When the angels heard Lilith's words, they insisted
she go back. But she swore to them by the name of the
living and eternal God: 'Whenever I see you or your
names or your forms in an amulet, I will have no power
over that infant.' She also agreed to have one hundred
of her children die every day. Accordingly, every day
one hundred demons perish, and for the same reason, we
write the angels' names on the amulets of young
children. When Lilith sees their names, she remembers
her oath, and the child recovers."
- The Alphabet of Ben Sira
Anyway, maybe you found that completely unamusing. If so, then there is a good chance you won't like my novel. Or at least this one, which I am hoping will become a series. Anyway, I did my 1000 words this morning at five AM. Now I am going to write some more.
So I spent the other half of my day doing research. Way, way too much research, but I found some interesting stuff. Like the story of Lilith, which depending on who your source is, Lilith can be seen as the spawn of Satan, or the first feminist.
Anyway I want to share this version of the story with you, because I think it is just nifty...
This is taken from the text of "The Alphabet of Ben
Sira", the text is dated somewhere between the 8th & 10th cent. CE, and its place within Judaism has been debated.
Soon afterward the young son of the king took ill,
Said Nebuchadnezzar, "Heal my son. If you don't, I
will kill you." Ben Sira immediately sat down and
wrote an amulet with the Holy Name, and he inscribed
on it the angels in charge of medicine by their names,
forms and images, and by their wings, hands, and feet.
Nebuchadnezzar looked at the amulet. "Who are these?"
"The angles who are in charge of medicine: Snvi,
Snsvi, and Smnglof (more common names Senoy, Sansenoy,
and Semangelof). After God created Adam, who was
alone, He said, 'It is not good for man to be alone'
(Gen. 2:18). He then created a woman for Adam, from
the earth, as He had created Adam himself, and called
her Lilith. Adam and Lilith began to fight. She said,
'I will not lie below,' and he said, 'I will not lie
beneath you, but only on top. For you are fit only to
be in the bottom position, while I am to be in the
superior one.' Lilith responded, 'We are equal to each
other inasmuch as we were both created from the
earth.' But they would not listen to one another. When
Lilith saw this, she pronounced the Ineffable Name and
flew away into the air. Adam stood in prayer before
his Creator: 'Sovereign of the universe!' he said,
'the woman you gave me has run away.' At once, the
Holy One, blessed be He, sent these three angles to
bring her back.
"Said the Holy One to Adam, 'If she agrees to come
back, fine. If not she must permit one hundred of her
children to die every day.' The angels left God and
pursued Lilith, whom they overtook in the midst of the
sea, in the mighty waters wherein the Egyptians were
destined to drown. They told her God's word, but she
did not wish to return. The angels said, 'We shall
drown you in the sea.'
"'Leave me!' she said. 'I was created only to cause
sickness to infants. If the infant is male, I have
dominion over him for eight days after his birth, and
if female, for twenty days.'
"When the angels heard Lilith's words, they insisted
she go back. But she swore to them by the name of the
living and eternal God: 'Whenever I see you or your
names or your forms in an amulet, I will have no power
over that infant.' She also agreed to have one hundred
of her children die every day. Accordingly, every day
one hundred demons perish, and for the same reason, we
write the angels' names on the amulets of young
children. When Lilith sees their names, she remembers
her oath, and the child recovers."
- The Alphabet of Ben Sira
Anyway, maybe you found that completely unamusing. If so, then there is a good chance you won't like my novel. Or at least this one, which I am hoping will become a series. Anyway, I did my 1000 words this morning at five AM. Now I am going to write some more.
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