So much for posting three days in a row. But hey, I actually got a post in. And on a weekday no less. Amazing.

Life was so much easier when I wasn't doing anything at work and I could update my blog regularly.

Sop my writing is finally back on track. It is crazy, but I really have been in this sort of funk. And I know you are probably tired of hearing me say this, because I have probably said it before, that now I am ready and pumped and my writing is back to where it once was. But honestly that would be a lie. Even when I wasn't working my writing outcomes were low. I just wasn't as productive as I wanted to be. For me, it seems to be a matter of discipline. I sit down to write and I get to something that is complicated and it is much easier to decide to do something else. It is so easy to walk away.

And now that my schedule is kind of insane and my freetime is limited I feel like something has to sacrifice and I don't know what that something should be. If I am writing, I can't read, I can't exercise I can't go hang out with friends, I can't date, and all the times I am doing those other things, All I think about it I could have been writing.

OK not all the time. For a while I lose track and actually enjoy myself and whatever I am doing. But reading for example. Everytime I pick up a book, I think, you should be writing not reading. You'll never sell a book if you don't finish the manuscript. I am beginning to understand why people lock themselves a way in log cabins with nothing but a typewriter. It is hard. There are so many distractions. So many reasons to walk away. And it really frustrates me that I can't enjoy a good book anymore. I feel like until I get this stupid draft done, I need to work on it. And yet there are so many good books that I want to read. My list just keeps on growing longer. Even books from my favorite authors books I would have read in less than a week. It has taken months to read. And finally I get to a point where I can get lost in the story, which is my favorite part, and it takes so long now to get to that point.

But I am grateful for my writing group I say it all the time. But the last meeting really got me motivated. Especially since another writer is battling with the same thing. I think that I am the type of person that needs deadlines. External deadlines. Like a grant. I know it is due in two weeks. I have to kick it up a notch and the adrenaline starts going and I can crank that sucker out. But without that deadline without that goal, I flounder. I flop around like a wet fish trying to find its way back to sea. Don't let me be the floppy wet fish anymore!

Hmm maybe I should set a goal to be done with a complete draft of the manuscript the the Columbus writers conference in August. I think that is reasonable. I have an outline and the group is reviewing the first two chapters for the June meeting.

ok I am on the verge of rambling. Verge you say? Yeah right. All I do on here is ramble.

So g'night. Peace Out.