Howdy web patrons! I have had the most awful week. Just one big fat problem after another, and I don't want to get into any of it here, because as much as people want to know about it, talking about it only gets me more upset.
So instead I decided to stay in, (thanks gals for letting me bail) and eat some food (which I haven't done in almost twelve hours) and take some medicine for the god awful migrane that I had going. I laid patheticaly on my bed with my eyes closed listening to the west wing, and for the third time today, I cried. But for the first time I also laughed. It is an odd moment when you hear yourself laughing and realize that you haven't done that all day, or all week. It is an odd sensation in your body, a lightness and a sense of no worries, that you get when you laugh, and I mean really truly laugh, not one of those fake laughs.
But I love West Wing and the episode I watched today, really got me. It is always the end that gets me. But the President and CJ were standing outside looking at the stars, and He was talking about how the last piece at the concert surprised him. And how so many people must have told him that his music was no good. He said he would have to write him a letter thanking him and praising his work. And I was just thinking how true that is. No matter what we do for a living or for a hobby, whether we write, we sing, we build houses, we invent things, we explore, we create...No matter what we do, there will always be those people who tell you you're doing it wrong. There will always be those people who don''t believe you know what you're doing, or don't think your work is valid. But there will always be people on the otherside. People who recognize your contribution, your skill, and your talents. people who appreciate the sacrifices you made and benefit from them. I guess as a person we just have to decide who is more important. Are we going to focus on the people trying to hold us back? Or are we going to focus on those who recognize our brilliance? For me, I suppose ninety editors could reject my work, and I could let that get to me. Or I can keep picturing the high school student down the street, or the stay at home mom who stand in line when the store opens to purchase my works. Some people may think I write trash. And you know what? I am ok with that. Because I started out writing for me, and for people like me, and I hope to continue writing that way.
I hope that what ever it is that you do, you take a step away from the supervisors, professors, parents, and spouses that try to beat you over the head with your inadequacies, and focus instead on people like me, your friends, your fans. Because like it or not, no matter what it is you do, there will always be at least one person out there that thinks the world of you. That idolizes you, that sees you as a rolemodel and a mentor. Keep going for them, Keep working for them and you'll find that the journey will be worth it.